Network Problems Resolved

At 5:48am Eastern time, one of our central aggregation switches suddenly stopped passing most traffic, without logging any problems or explanation for the failure. This was not a normal failure mode.

Over the past several months, we have been upgrading our switching infrastructure to utilize newer equipment with higher capacity, and our investigation of this problem was initially focused on the new equipment. As a result, the legacy switch was not immediately identified as faulty; it was rebooted and returned to normal service by 6:40am.

For the duration of the outage, traffic to the majority of our servers and services was disrupted. We apologize for this outage; our recent upgrades have been designed precisely to avoid this type of scenario. We currently expect to have the offending legacy switches out of service within the next seven to ten days, although this will be accelerated further if there are any additional problems.

Upon deployment of the new switches, we have further enhancements planned which will make it nearly impossible for any one device to cause significant problems in network connectivity.

SATIN TIGHTS NO LONGER. Joss will not be fighting for our rights after all.

You (hopefully) heard it here first: I'm no longer slated to make Wonder Woman. What? But how? My chest... so tight! Okay, stay calm and I'll explain as best I can. It's pretty complicated, so bear with me. I had a take on the film that, well, nobody liked. Hey, not that complicated.

Let me stress first that everybody at the studio and Silver Pictures were cool and professional. We just saw different movies, and at the price range this kind of movie hangs in, that's never gonna work. Non-sympatico. It happens all the time. I don't think any of us expected it to this time, but it did. Everybody knows how long I was taking, what a struggle that script was, and though I felt good about what I was coming up with, it was never gonna be a simple slam-dunk. I like to think it rolled around the rim a little bit, but others may have differing views.

The worst thing that can happen in this scenario is that the studio just keeps hammering out changes and the writer falls into a horrible limbo of development. These guys had the clarity and grace to skip that part. So I'm a free man.

Well, sorta. There is that "Goners" movie I can finally finish polishing, and plenty of other things in the hopper I've wanted to pursue. I'm as relieved as I am disappointed, and both of those things lead to drink, so that's a plus. Truly, you may be hearing some interesting things brewing in the coming months. But all potential jets therein will be visible.

But most importantly, I never have to answer THAT question again!!!! And you don't have to link to every rumor site! Finally and forever: I never had an actress picked out, or even a consistant front-runner. I didn't have time to waste on casting when I was so busy air-balling on the script. (No! Rim! There was rim!) That's the greatest relief of all. I can do interviews again!

Thanks for your time. You are the people who make the world go 'round. Or, no, science does that.

-j.

ps All right, it was Cobie Smulders. Sorry, Cobes.